Five Weird Things Other Asians Have Said to Me
I’ve been tagged by Ji-in to respond to this meme. Eeep. I don’t usually go on much about ethnicity these days. And here in Hawai‘i, the title might as well say “five weird things other people have said to me”. Nevertheless, here goes.
1. It’s funny being hapa. People try to pigeonhole you into a neat category, and they get confused when you don’t fit. When I lived in Berkeley in college, most every Asian group thought I was one of them. The Chinese thought I was part-Chinese. The Vietnamese thought I was part-Vietnamese. The Filipinos were convinced I was mestizo with Spanish blood. Funny, though. Nobody ever asked me if I was part-Korean.
2. In the barhopping days of my youth, this one Korean mama-san was convinced that my friend Garrett and I were brothers. Now, I’m Korean-English-German and Garrett is Portuguese-Chinese-Scottish (I think). We couldn’t see it. I guess all hapa boys look alike, or something.
3. On the other hand, there have been times when it’s been a little eerie. Judy tells me of a time when Chris was a baby, and she walked into a Korean-owned store carrying him. The shop owner took a look at Judy, and at Chris, and immediately said, “Your husband is Korean, isn’t he?” Judy was astonished. Was it that obvious?
4. When I was little, sometimes my mom would meet old friends who hadn’t seen her for a while. They would exclaim over me, and tell her how much I looked like her. “Mom,” I asked after one such event. “I’m adopted, right? So how come they say I look like you? What am I supposed to say back to them?” “Just smile and say thank you,” my mom advised. Smart lady.
5. Judy’s students will call her at home to ask about homework assignments, or student government things, or college recommendation letters, and I sometimes end up fielding their calls. “No, I’m sorry, she’s not in right now. May I tell her who called?” They invariably get all tongue-tied. I later found out that they say I sound like a haole butler. Hey Mom and Dad, I guess all that effort to stamp out my pidgin accent paid off.
February 7th, 2006 at 9:41 am
As a footnote, may I express my exasperation with the HTML hyphenation standards. They suck.
February 13th, 2006 at 8:52 am
1. Funny, I always feel exactly the opposite. Around 100% Asians, I feel like the haole one. Around 100% haoles, I feel like the Asian one.
2. I don’t see it…
3. I love reminding Judy about that.
4. My sister is adopted, did I ever mention that? Thing is, though, that my parents happened to adopt a child with the same ethnic mix. I’m not sure if it was intentional or not. I never asked and am not particularly curious.
5. It’s that Iolani education at work. I’ve had other local people ask me how long I’ve lived in Hawaii.
February 13th, 2006 at 9:23 am
1. See, now that sounds like my cousins from New Jersey, the ones who are half Okinawan and half German Jewish. My cousin Sara told me that in school, she was always the Asian girl. Funny; whenever they came to visit, I always thought of them as my haole cousins.
2. Yup.
3. Then a few years later she was with Tommy, different Korean store, different Korean shop owner, same question.
4. You’ve mentioned it. She matches you and your brother fairly well so it certainly wasn’t obvious.
5. I’ve had guys ask me where in California I’m from.