Lisa ran down the stairs, she could not catch up with the tumbling Taskeven who managed to land face down on the bottom of the stairs, she finally got to Taskeven and screamed “Oh my god Taskeven are you all right?”
“I am fine Commander Baxter.” said Taskeven who tried to raise himself from the floor, with Lisa slightly helping him up.
“I am Lisa, remember.” said Lisa
“Yes, you are right.” said a somewhat dazed Taskeven “Are we at the Forms Office?”
“Yes we are.” replied Lisa.
“At least we are here.” said Taskeven.
“Are you sure you are alright Taskeven?” asked Lisa
“I am fine Commander Baxter.” replied Taskeven
“I am Lieutenant Silva, remember me, Lieutenant Lisa Silva.” said Lisa
“Oh than who is Commander Baxter then?” asked Taskeven
“That is Karen who is Commander Baxter.” replied Lisa
“The two of you sort of looked the same.” said Taskeven.
“We do, really?” asked Lisa
“Yes you do.” asked Taskeven
“Was this before or after you went down the stairs?” asked Lisa
“Before.” replied Taskeven
“And now?” asked Lisa
“I still think the two of you looked the same.” replied Taskeven
Lisa thought about raising some of her fingers to Taskeven and have him tell her the number of fingers she had raised to make sure that he was all right but she decided against that for fear that some combination of raised fingers might offend Taskeven and right now she did not want to take that chance. She then said “Since we are here why not fill in that form.”
“Yes, fill in form.” said Taskeven
Lisa and Taskeven continued on this corridor until they encountered an open window with a flat surface sticking out. Inside that window was a small office with a desk inside of it. Behind that desk was a person sitting down looking at a strange box.
Taskeven said to the person “Excuse me Arcevar Noveren I am here to fill in a form.”
The person ignored Taskeven.
Taskeven looked at Lisa, he then looked at the person on the other side of the desk and said “Excuse me Arcevar Noveren I am here to fill in a form.”
Again the person ignored Taskeven.
Taskeven bowed before the person on the other side of the desk and said “Excuse me Arcevar Noveren I am here to fill in a form.”
The person still ignored Taskeven.
Taskeven turned to Lisa, pointed to the person on the other side of the desk and said “Why does this Arcevar Noveren ignore me, can it not hear me?”
The person behind the desk then said “I can hear you fine, but what you can not read the sign over there?” the person pointed to a sign on the window’s flat surface that read Ring Bell for Service.
Taskeven turned to Lisa and asked “What does this sign say?”
“It says ‘Ring Bell for Service’” replied Lisa
“Ring?” asked Taskeven
“Yeah, just press that button there.” said Lisa
“How does pressing a button ring bell for service?” asked Taskeven
“Just press the button like this.” said Lisa who then hit the bell’s button, it make a sharp ringing sound that surprised Taskeven.
The person behind the desk turned to Lisa, smiled and asked “Yes may I help you.”
Taskeven said “I am here to fill in a form.”
“Wait your turn, I am helping this young lady here.” said the person behind the desk “now young lady what can I do for you.”
Lisa said to the person behind the desk and pointing to Taskeven “Actually he needs to fill in a form.”
“Then why did you ring the bell?” asked the person behind the desk.
“Because it said ring bell for service.” said Lisa
“Well do you need service?” asked the person behind the desk.
“No, “ replied Lisa who then pointed to Taskeven “he needs to be serviced.”
“He can not ring the bell for himself?” asked the person behind the desk.
“I do not know. Taskeven press the button to ring the bell for service.” said Lisa
Taskeven attempted to press the button on the bell but because he applied very little pressure on the button it made a very soft sound.
Taskeven said “I am here to fill in a form.”
The person behind the desk replied, “I am still helping this young lady here.”
“I pressed the button to ring the bell.” said Taskeven
“No you did not” said the person behind the desk
“Yes I did” said Taskeven
“I did not hear the bell.” said the person behind the desk, the person behind the desk turned to Lisa and asked “Did you hear a bell?”
“No I did not” replied Lisa.
“See, now do not bother me while I am helping this young lady.” said the person behind the desk.
“But she does not need your help, I do.” said Taskeven
“Is this true?” asked the person behind the desk to Lisa
“Yes it is.” said Lisa
“What are you some sort of trouble maker?” asked the person behind the desk to Lisa.
“No I am not.” said Lisa “Taskeven ring the bell.”
“What?” asked Taskeven
“Press the button to ring the bell.” said Lisa
Taskeven attempted to press the button again on the bell but like before he applied very little pressure on the button and it still made a very soft sound.
Taskeven said “I am here to fill in a form.”
“Excuse me” said the person behind the desk “but I am still helping out this young lady.”
“I rang the bell” said Taskeven
“No you did not.” said the person behind the desk
“Yes I did.” said Taskeven
“Are you trying to make trouble too?” asked the person behind the desk
“No I am not.” replied Taskeven
“Then wait your turn.” said the person behind the desk. “Now young lady what do you require?”
“I do not require anything.” said Lisa who then pointed to Taskeven “My friend here requires some service.”
“Then your friend needs to ring the bell for service.” said the person behind the desk.
“I tried, twice.” said Taskeven
“I did not hear a thing.” said the person behind the desk “Did you hear a thing young lady?”
“No I did not.” replied Lisa.
“See.” said the person behind the desk
Lisa said to Taskeven “Okay Taskeven watch what I do when I press the button to ring the bell for service.” Lisa then pressed the button on the bell with a greater force than Taskeven did, it make a sharp ringing sound that surprise Taskeven again.
The person behind the desk turned to Lisa, smiled and said “Yes may I help you?”
Taskeven said “I am here to fill in a form.”
The person behind the desk said to Taskeven “Can’t you see I am helping this young lady here.”
“Why?” asked Taskeven
“Because she rang the bell. Now do not bother me.” said the person behind the desk.
“Actually I do not need the help” said Lisa who then pointed to Taskeven “he needs to be helped.”
“Then why did you ring the bell if you do not need help, are you some sort of trouble maker or something?” said the person behind the desk
“No I am not.” replied Lisa. “Taskeven just ring the bell.”
Taskeven tried for the third time to press the button on the bell but like the other two attempts before he applied very little pressure on the button and it still made a very soft sound and there was no response from the person behind the desk so he did not bother to ask the person behind the desk that he needed to fill in a form.
After a few seconds Taskeven tried a fourth time to press the button on the bell but that too made a very soft sound that the person behind the desk did not respond too. Lisa tried to intervene by attempting to ring the bell but Taskeven held up a free limb to prevent Lisa from trying.
On his fifth attempt to press the button on the bell he applied a slightly more pressure on it and it was enough to make an audible sound. The person behind the desk turned to Taskeven, smiled at him and asked “Yes may I help you?”
Taskeven said “I am here to fill in a form.”
“Which one?” asked the person behind the desk.
Taskeven forgot which form it was, he turned to Lisa and Lisa said “Three Nine Eight Seven.”
“Young lady!” scolded the person behind the desk “do not interrupt me, I am trying to help this, this, this.” he points to Taskeven “excuse me are you an animal, vegetable or mineral?”
“Animal, vegetable or mineral.” replied Taskeven
“Yes are you animal, vegetable or mineral?” asked the person behind the desk.
“I do not know” said Taskeven. Taskeven turned to Lisa and asked “Lisa am I animal, vegetable or mineral?”
“The jury is still out on that one.” replied Lisa
“You!” said the person behind the desk to Lisa “stop interrupting I am trying to help, this, this, this.” who again pointed to Taskeven.
“Does it make a difference?” asked Taskeven
“Yes.” said the person behind the desk
“How?” asked Taskeven
“Well if you were an animal I would ask you to produce a document titled One, One, One, One, One, A.” said the person behind the desk. “Now if you were a vegetable I would ask you to produce a document titled One, One, One, One, One, M and if you were a mineral I would ask you to produce a document titled One, One, One, One, One, V.”
“Should not the mineral produce the document titled One, One, One, One, One M and the vegetable produce One, One, One, One, One V?” asked Lisa “Or for that matter why would a rock need to produce a document titled One, One, One, One, One M or where would it put such a document. It is like rock have pockets.”
“You there!” said the person behind the desk to Lisa “Who do you think you are a government employee? You think you know all of the forms and documents that we have here?”
Lisa just stood there in silence. Taskeven waved to the person behind the desk and said “What about me?”
“Are you government employee?” asked the person behind the desk.
“No I am not, I am newly arrived to this world.” replied Taskeven
“Oh and you are from outer space then?” asked the person behind the desk
Taskeven looked at Lisa, Lisa nodded up and down at Taskeven.
Taskeven turned to the person behind the desk and said “Yes I am from outer space.”
“Why didn’t you say so in the first place?” asked the person behind the desk
“It was not one of the choices that you gave me.” replied Taskeven.
“Really?” asked the person behind the desk.
“Yes.” replied Taskeven
“Next?” said the person behind the desk.
“Next?” asked Taskeven
“Yes for the next person in line. Now move along.” said the person behind the desk.
Lisa and Taskeven looked behind them, they were the only ones in the line to this Forms Office.
Lisa pointed to the button on the bell, Taskeven tried to press the button on the bell, it made a ding sound and the person behind the desk looked at Taskeven, smiled and said “Yes may I help you?”
Taskeven said “I am here to fill in a form.”
“Which one?” asked the person behind the desk.
Taskeven looked at Lisa and Taskeven remembered the form and said to the person behind the desk “Three Nine Eight Seven.”
“Three Nine Eight Seven what?” asked the person behind the desk.
“Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” replied Taskeven.
“Hang on will get a Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven for you.” said the person behind the desk.
“No wait not that form.” said Taskeven
“Which form do you want?” asked the person behind the desk
“Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” replied Taskeven
“Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven, hang on while I go get it.” said the person behind the desk.
“Excuse me” said Lisa “he requested Form Three Nine Eight Seven and not Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.”
“You young lady, please stay out of this.” said the person behind the desk who then turned to Taskeven and asked “what form did you want again?”
“Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” replied Taskeven.
“Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven” said the person behind the desk
“No wait, it is Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” said Taskeven
“Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.” said the person behind the desk.
“No!” said Taskeven
“To what?” asked the person behind the desk
“To Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.” replied Taskeven.
“Of course you have to write on them, otherwise the forms would be useless if you don’t.” said the person behind the desk.
“Write on them?” asked Taskeven
“Yes” said the person behind the desk “that is how things work around here, you will need to fill out forms by writing on them.”
“Fill out?” asked Taskeven
“Yes” said the person behind the desk.
“I was told to fill in the form.” said Taskeven
“Really? What idiot told you that?” asked the person behind the desk
Taskeven pointed to Lisa, Lisa in turned smiled and waved at the person behind the desk. The person behind the desk then said “You, the trouble marker I should have known it was you. Where are you from young lady?”
“Kauai” replied Lisa
“Young lady do not interrupt me while I am helping someone else navigate through the various levels of government bureaucracy.” said the person behind the desk, who then turned to Taskeven and asked “now what form you want again?”
“Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” replied Taskeven
“Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven” replied the person behind the desk.
“No, wait I want Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” said Taskeven
“Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.” replied the person behind the desk.
“No, no I want Form Three Nine Eight Seven” said Taskeven
“Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven” replied the person behind the desk
“Excuse me.” said Taskeven “I need to fill in Form Three Nine Eight Seven.”
“No, you need to fill out Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” said the person behind the desk.
“Yes I do, please get it for me.” said Taskeven
“Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.” said the person behind the desk.
“No not that one, I want the other one.” said Taskeven
“Which one?” asked the person behind the desk
“Form Three Nine Eight Seven” replied Taskeven
“Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.” said the person behind the desk.
“Why do you keep changing the form numbers on me?” asked Taskeven
“I am not.” replied the person behind the desk.
“Yes you are.” said Taskeven, “I ask for Form Three Nine Eight Seven and you keep saying Right Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.”
“It is the same form” said the person behind the desk.
“It is?” asked Taskeven
“Yes,” replied the person behind the desk, “your way I have to remember four numbers while my way I only need to remember two numbers. Less chance for errors that way and believe me you do not want to have errors on the Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.”
“What about the Right Form?” asked Taskeven
“Of course you have to write on the form.” said the person behind the desk “otherwise this government will not work.”
“Fine can you get for me Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven so I can fill it out.” said Taskeven
“Let me check.” said the person behind the desk. The person behind the desk clicked on a lot of buttons. The person behind the desk then said. “We do not have Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.”
“Wait I was told that this office had a Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” said Taskeven
“But you just asked me to look for a Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven.” said the person behind the desk.
“No I did not.” said Taskeven
“Yes you did.” said the person behind the desk.
“Lisa did I ask this Arcevar Noveren to look for Form Three Nine Eight Seven or Form Thirty Nine Eighty Seven?” asked Taskeven
“Hey do not ask her, she is the trouble marker remember!” said the person behind the desk.
“Alright can you check on Form Three Nine Eight Seven then.” asked Taskeven
“Let me check.” said the person behind the desk. Again the person behind the desk clicked on a lot of buttons. The person behind the desk then said. “We do have Form Three Nine Eight Seven.”
“Fine I will take it” said Taskeven
“You want the United Nations form, the United States form, the State of Hawaii form or the City and County of Honolulu form?” asked the person behind the desk.
“Is there a difference?” asked Taskeven
“Yes there is a difference” said the person behind the desk.
“Which one do I need?” asked Taskeven
“Which one do you want?” asked the person behind the desk
“Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” replied Taskeven
“Yes but which one?” asked the person behind the desk.
“Form Three Nine Eight Seven.” replied Taskeven
“Do you want the United Nations Form Three Nine Eight Seven, the United States Form Three Nine Eight Seven, the State of Hawaii Form Three Nine Eight Seven or the City and County of Honolulu Form Three Night Eight Seven?” asked the person behind the desk.
Taskeven though about asking Lisa but he feared that if Lisa spoke up again the person behind the desk would say Lisa was a trouble maker. Taskeven then said “United Nations.”
“Hang on.” said the person behind the desk “I will find a copy of that form to fill out.”. The person behind the desk moved away from Taskeven and Lisa to look for the form. Lisa and Taskeven just looked at each other while they waited for the person behind the desk to look for the form. Taskeven wanted to ask Lisa something but he figured if Lisa spoke up again the person behind the desk would stop the search for the form and tell Lisa that she was a trouble maker.
Lisa on the other hand was rocking back and forth on her heels, she figured this was the safest way to pass the time. After about two minutes the person behind the desk returned to the desk and said to Taskeven “Here you go United Nations Form Three Nine Eight Seven. Your name please?”
“My name?” asked Taskeven
“Yes your name, what is your name?” asked the person behind the desk.
“Taskeven.” replied Taskeven
“And how do you spell Taskeven?” asked the person behind the desk
“Spell?” asked Taskeven
“Yes, how do you spell Taskeven?” asked the person behind the desk.
“How do I spell Taskeven?” asked Taskeven
“How should I know, I was asking you on how to spell Taskeven, it is after all your name.” said the person behind the desk
“Yes it is.” said Taskeven
“Then how do you spell Taskeven?” asked the person behind the desk.
“I do not know” replied Taskeven
“What do you expect me to know how to spell Taskeven?’ asked the person behind the desk.
“I have no idea.” replied Taskeven “Maybe Lisa might know how to spell Taskeven.”
“Who is Lisa?” asked the person behind the desk.
Taskeven pointed in the direction of Lisa, Lisa for her part smiled and waved at the person behind the desk.
The person behind the desk pointed to Lisa and said to Taskeven “Her? The trouble maker? The one who told you, you need to fill in a form as opposed to fill out a form?”
“Yes” said Taskeven
“Alright, then young lady.” said Taskeven
“Yes?” asked Lisa
“How do you spell it?” asked the person behind the desk
“Spell what?” asked Lisa
“Taskeven” replied the person behind the desk
“It is spelled T, A, S, K, E, V, E, N” said Lisa
“Spell it again please?” said the person behind the desk.
“T, A, S, K, E, V, E, N” said Lisa
“Go slow please, I am having a hard time with the spelling.” said the person behind the desk.
“T” said Lisa
“T” said the person behind the desk
“A” said Lisa
“A” repeated the person behind the desk
“S” said Lisa
“S” said the person behind the desk
“K” said Lisa
“K” said the person behind the desk
“E” said Lisa
“E” repeated the person behind the desk
“V” said Lisa
“V” said the person behind the desk
“E” said Lisa
“I already got the E” said the person behind the desk
“There is a second E” said Lisa
“Where?” asked the person behind the desk
“After the V” said Lisa
“Really?” asked the person behind the desk
“Yes.” said Lisa
“Right.” said the person behind the desk
“E” said Lisa
“A third E?” asked the person behind the desk
“No there are only two E’s in Taskeven. Not three E’s.” replied Lisa
“Then why did you say E again?” asked the person behind the desk
“You said right not E just a while ago.” replied Lisa.
“I did?” asked the person behind the desk
“Yes you did.” replied Lisa
“Right. Go on.” said the person behind the desk
“What do you have so far?” asked Lisa
“T, A, S, K, E, V, E, E” said the person behind the desk
“I think you need to remove the last E from the there” suggested Lisa
“I do” asked the person behind the desk
“Yes.” said Lisa
“Alright, done” said the person behind the desk
“Do not forget the N” said Lisa
“Where?” asked the person behind the desk
“After the E” said Lisa
“Which E?” asked the person behind the desk
“The second E.” replied Lisa
“I wiped out that E.” said the person behind the desk
“No you are supposed to wipe out the third E, not the second E” said Lisa
“I never had three E’s, I only had two E.” said the person behind the desk.
“What do you have now?” asked Lisa
“T, A, S, K, E, V, E” said the person behind the desk
“Just add the N after the E.” said Lisa
“After which E?” asked the person behind the desk
“The last one, on the right.” said Lisa
“Yes I can write.” said the person behind the desk.
“So what do you have now?” asked Lisa
“T, A, S, K, E, V, E” said the person behind the desk
“What happen to the N?” asked Lisa
“What N?” asked the person behind the desk
“The one that followed the E” said Lisa
“Which E?” asked the person behind the desk
“The last one on the right.” said Lisa
“Yes I can write.” said the person behind the desk.
“Then add the N” said Lisa
“Where?” asked the person behind the desk
“After the E” said Lisa
“After which E?” asked the person behind the desk
“The last one on the right.” said Lisa
“Yes I can write.” said the person behind the desk.
“Just add the N” said Lisa
“Again?” asked the person behind the desk
“What do you mean again?” asked Lisa
“This is the third time you have said to add the N” said the person behind the desk
“How many N’s do you have now?” asked Lisa
“None.” said the person behind the desk
“Just add one N at the end.” said Lisa
“A fourth N?” asked the person behind the desk
“No, just one N, and only one N at the end of what you got.” said Lisa
“N” said the person behind the desk
“Yes” said Lisa
“Any more letters?” asked the person behind the desk.
“No that is it.” said Lisa.
“Are you sure?” asked the person behind the desk
“Yes I am sure.” said Lisa.
“Alright” said the person behind the desk, who then turned to Taskeven and said “Taskeven could you please put an ‘X’ here on this form here?”
“An X?” asked the person behind the desk.
“Yes, just draw two lines like this on this space on the form.” said the person behind the desk who then moved to Lisa and Taskeven and showed Taskeven how to draw an X on the form. Taskeven barely managed to it but it was acceptable to the person behind the desk.
“Alright then,” said the person behind the desk “the United Nations Form Three Nine Eight Seven has been properly filled out, I will forward this to my supervisors so that it will be properly acted upon. You will be notified when this form has been processed. Thank you and have a nice day!”
Posted by Helen at November 26, 2002 11:31 PM