Apotheosis

Tired.

So tired.

So very tired.

Want to sleep.

Rest.

Rest forever.

He wants to rest but something pokes and prods at the back of his mind. It’s like an itch that seems to travel all over his body, but he can’t quite seem to scratch it. His hands can’t quite reach.

No, wait. He doesn’t have hands. He has nothing. No body. No form. No sense of where he is. He speaks. No, he has no voice.

What does he have?

Oh, yes. The itch.

It itches so much!

Why?

Has he been always here, in this place of utter, desolate lonliness. He thinks so. He thinks that he has been there since the beginning of time and will go on like this for eternity.

Until the end of the world.

A quick pinprick, sharp and painful, suddenly punches through the cloudy mists of his memory. That was supposed to mean something, wasn’t it? The end of the world.

He cannot remember! All he wants to do is rest.

But the others, the others with their voices, their incessent voices, they will not let him exist in peace! The others invade his loneliness. The isolation goes away, but something about the links do not sit very weill with him. It feels wrong. Very wrong. A comfortable pair of shoes feels right, but this connectedness, this linking, feels very very wrong.

The voices say that it is right and well and good to be connected with each other. He is not so sure. He remembers something about isolation and being alone. He needed to be alone? No. He wanted to be alone? No, that wasn’t it either. His thoughts trip and fall through the minds of the others.

The others laugh and laugh. The others say that he does not belong with them. He is too weak. He is too dumb. His thoughts stutter and make their minds feel like sandpaper. His mind is too mortal. The others say that he does not belong anywhere.

He wonders what that means. Wasn’t he always like this? Without body, without form, and yet, and yet. And yet...

The others laugh again. They accuse him of being too narrow-minded, too unambitious. It is clear that he does not belong with them.

But where does he belong, then? Why was he here with the others in the first place if he did not belong there?

The others are silent for a long while, and he wonders if he has offended them so much that they have decided to leave him alone forever. If that was so, good! He wanted to be alone. He needed to think! He needed to remember what it was he had to do. THere was something very imprtant that he was doing.

A soft voice whispers in his mind. “You are here because you’ve done a bad, bad thing.”

He startles at the voice. What bad thing? Was that the thing he had to remember? Perhaps he was going to try to not remember. Ah! Perhaps he succeeded in not remembering. Good.

“Idiot.”

He cringes at the sound of the word. He feels himself shriveling before it. A powerful word.

“A word that befits you.”

He wonders why they suddenly speak with one voice. One strong voice that seems so quiet yet begins to rip apart his very being as soon as he hears it.

“We are together. Always together. Together, we are strong.”

He asks if he could join them.

Mocking laughter shocks his consciousness.

“You, join us? How stupid. Why would we wish for you to join us?”

He was one of them, wasn’t he?

“No.”

This conversation starts to make him very sleepy and confused. He wants to take a nap. He wants to rest forever so that he won’t be able to hear the names and the laughter anymore. Soon, he drifts off to sleep.

***

Eden is much smaller than he thought it would be. No matter. Caius wanders through it, admiring its flowers and picking fruit from whatever trees he desires. Even, hmmm, even that large one in the center. That particular one that God once told Adam and Eve was forbidden to them. He hurries over to the tree and grabs the nearest fruit in reach.

No thunder and lightning. No booming voice of God.

He plucks it from its branch.

No earthauakes.

He grabs another and another, filling his pockets with them. Stories may be stories, but there’s always a grain of truth in them, especially in the After.

No heavenly vengeance. The ground doesn’t open up to swallow him whole.

Bah, he knew it was just a story all along. But if it was just a story, then might these fruits not be what everyone else says they are?

Go ahead, take a bite.

“Shall I?” Caius wonders, fishing out one of the fruits from his pocket. It isn’t an apple, as some silly little mortals believe. It is smaller than an apple, and its flesh is very soft to the touch.

Of course. It won’t hurt you. In fact, it will make you more powerful.

Caius takes a bite. The fruit is messy, and the juice runs down his chin and onto his white robes. It is thick and red, like blood. The fruit isn’t sweet, nor is it sour. For some strange reason, Caius thinks it even tastes like blood.

It IS blood.

Caius drops the half-eaten piece of fruit on the ground. “Ugh! WHy did you make me eat that?”

Why wouldn’t the Tree of Knowledge produce bloodfruit?

“I...I don’t know,” Caius wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. “Whose blood?”

The blood of all who know firsthand the consequences of good and evil. Victims of war, mostly.

“Why do we need so many?”

Because, it is you who will call us up from our eternities in infamy. You must be willing to offer a sacrifice. What better sacrifice is there than the blood of the sacrificed?

This makes a lot of sense to Caius. “Have I gotten enough fruit?”

Yes.

“Now, where must I go?”

To Earth. Earth is where we shall return to be reborn.

“Earth is a nasty place,” Caius says. “It’s plagued with the portents of your arrival.”

All except for one place.

“Where is that?”

Bethlehem.

***

Angels do not die. They are believed to be immortal beings who have existed before the arrival of humanity and who will be witness to humanity’s ultimate destruction.

Gabriel will burn in Hell before he wants to see that happening within the next few days. His mind is foggy, but he does remember Caius’ sudden show of Theo power. And that he got kicked in the head. His hands probe his shoulders, and he groans softly. His wings are now nothing more than charred stumps hanging limply from his shoulder blades. He gets up, his head suddenly feeling like it’s whirling around madly. No time. Got to stop them.

Why hadn’t he pieced it all together before the end of the world started? There was a reason why it was Caius who went to Eve to take the Test. He underestimated that shrewd Roman emperor. Non-interference be damned! He wasn’t going to sit idly by and watch the world end! And after that, existence and the After itself dissipate as well! He liked existing a whole lot. And besides, he wasn’t going to miss the next Lord of the Rings film for anything!

Still unsteady on his feet, Gabriel shuffles towards the open gates of Eden. He wonders what Caius is doing inside. Caius, Gabriel reasons, must be after the fruit from the Three of Knowledge, but how is bloodfruit going to help? He grabs his sword and runs to the middle of the garden.

“You!” Gabriel bellows.

Caius turns around. “Oh, Gabe. Sorry about that little nap I made you go on. It’s strictly business, nothing personal you understand.”

Gabriel scowls. “With your kind, everything is personal. You infamous Theos with your vendettas stretching for thousands of years.”

“Well, we’re nothing if we’re not patient,” Caius shrugs.

Gabriel takes a swing at Caius, but the Roman dodges the blow easily. “Damn you! Hold still so I can hack you to pieces!”

”Oh, Gabe, such language! Now really, what would your boss think of you now?” Caius grins. He takes a piece of fruit out of his pockets. “Strange how a small thing like this can hold so much blood.”

“You picked it,” Gabriel says softly. “You bastard. You picked from the Tree?”

Caius tosses the fruit in the air and catches it before popping it back into his pocket.

“That is innocent blood, don’t you understand that?” Gabriel says. “Blood spilled in the name of others’ mad schemes. Wars started by madmen like you.”

“Pity,” Caius sighs. “You’ll never understand why I’m going through all this trouble, will you?”

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe someone promised you something in return,” Gabriel wonders. “Hey, what about this. Lucifer said that maybe you could have a bit of Theo power in exchange for helping him out. How’s that for a guess?”

“That’s...that’s a pretty good guess,” Caius says. “But, as usual, the good guys got the details wrong.”

“Aren’t you going to tell me everything about it? About this great big plan of the infamous Theos and how they’ll take over the world then ultimately destroy it?”

“No, that’s too melodramatic. Bond villains do that,” Caius says. “I’m just content to watch your flimsy little wing-stumps flutter away in the breeze.”

“You always were a sadist,” Gabriel grunts glumly.

“True,” Caius smiles. “But I will say something melodramatic to apease you, I suppose. There is nothing you or anyone else in your little ‘do-good’ party can do to stop us. The portents are appearing on Earth, which means our little plan will work.”

Gabriel takes another swing at Caius.

“You’ve gotten a bit too boring for my taste, Gabe,” Caius sighs, sending a large blast right into Gabriel’s chest. The angel’s body falls to the ground and slumps over.

“You did say Bethlehem, right?” Caius asks the voice in his head.

Yes.

“Right, then. Looks like I’m gong to have to take a little trip.” Caius rubs his hands together and begins to head out of Eden. “A node to Earth, let’s see if I can find one.”

Posted by Michelle at November 24, 2002 8:39 AM