Giving
I had always considered myself to be a helpful and giving person. I did my share to buy fund-raiser candy from the neighborhood kids, donated clothes that no longer fit to the community thrift store, and ate only dolphin-friendly tuna. Oh course, I had aspirations of doing much more for the community and the world, but that was always on hold until I could accomplish certain personal goals. The problem was, these certain goals had a way of being replaced by other certain goals, and I just never could find the time or energy to save the world.
However, my knowing that I did want to be a helpful and giving person, kind of made me feel better about not doing anything towards being a helpful and giving person. It also allowed me the ability to shake my head at others and to point my index finger in their direction, knowing that I had every intention of doing all kinds of wonderful things…one day.
Suddenly, I discovered that I had gotten older. I was no longer the idealistic youth that blamed all the sins of the world on those that came before me. Instead, I was one of the many that had done far too little to make this world a better place for others or myself. The thoughts of what I was going to do one day no longer seemed to provide solace for my lack of doing now.
Since coming upon this realization, I started making a conscious effort to give something every day. Though I still lack the funds to give the millions of dollars to charity that I would if I was super rich, I do give. There are so many ways of giving that cost nothing and involves no money. And though I still can’t find the time to donate large portions of my life towards a cause, there are a variety of ways of giving that don’t take large quantities of time.
After making a conscious effort to give in one way or another, there comes a point when the effort does eventually come naturally. As much joy that is felt in giving a loved one a present at Christmas, that same certain joy can be found in the giving of a small gesture of kindness to another, or picking up trash on a walk around the neighborhood, or looking into a strangers eyes and smiling while silently wishing them well. The rush I receive in this giving is difficult to describe, and oftentimes I wonder who is the giver and who is the receiver in this exchange. Although I’m still not saving the world, my own world has become a better place to live in.