Debates
The first of three Presidential Debates will be held tonight. It’s unfortunate that in a time where there are so many critical issues on our national table, the two campaigns feel a need to have a 32-page contract of rules and conditions in order to have a debate. It’s almost a stretch to call it debating. Whatever happened to spontaneity? Don’t these campaigns know that America has a love affair with Reality TV?
Oh well, I’m still going to watch. Maybe I’ll buy a bottle of booze and drink a shot whenever someone lies or stretches the truth. I’m predicting a hangover for tomorrow.
Ten Lesser Known Rules of the Debates
* Shoes required; shirts optional.
* No playing with Gameboy while the other candidate is speaking.
* Following each answer, Regis Philbin will ask, “Final Answer?”
* Candidates must wear fire repellent pants.
* Point deductions for all clothing malfunctions.
* Cell phones must be turned off.
* Dick Cheney must be leashed.
* Shadow puppets prohibited.
* Donald Trump will determine who should be hired and fired.
* Scores from swimsuit competition will be one-third of the total score.