…na mana’o ulu wale…

OH MY GOSH. you BOTH actually parked WITHIN the lines of your parking stalls today! HOORAY!!!!

thank you. can you do that all the time?!??!

my gosh, i didn’t realize how funny the show is. i know it’s not something to laugh at because it’s a real disease, but it reminds me so much of my sister and cousin who are so germaphobic. i love the way he’s so observant too and can figure out things. he’s such a fountain of knowledge. i wish i were like that.

i don’t even want to address you any more, i’m that upset at you. how can you have escaped again? i put you back and went overboard. seeing how you broke through the other barrier, i got fed up and went to home depot and *really* bandaged the hole up good. i’d like to see you break through *that*! no, actually, i don’t want to see that.

it’s frustrating trying to get you back in. you don’t listen like previous pets. you know how to hide. you know how to make me run in circles. it’s not even funny.

when i finally caught you today, after about an hour of chasing you, i lifted you and saw that you were really light and bony. you have not been eating? even putting you back in the cage, you didn’t seem to chomp or want water or anything. it’s a bit worrying. are you like a cat, who tries to go elsewhere to die? is that why you keep trying to break out? what is going on?

i hope this new barrier is effective in keeping you in. again, it’s only for your own safety. i don’t want you getting at anything that can make you sick! so please? stay in your cage? you have a lot of room in there, and it’s safe for you. i don’t want anything happening to my little girl.

thank you.

again?!?! again?!?!?!?!?!? and you took your cagemate with you this time?? how in the world did you two unpatch the hole? grrrr. you two are smarter than i thought.

this time i woke up the boy and had him make noise to get you out. baby girl was easy to catch but you were so tricky. after chasing you around the whole house you made the mistake of turning into the bathroom! aha! easy capture after closing the door! you went running for the door but BONK. i was able to catch you then. naughty girl!

i repatched the hole and now you’re sulking again, defeated. but i have far less sympathy for you now! i was woken up by your scratching about in the night and now i can’t get back to sleep–and neither can the boy! and we were both so tired, but are now both so wide awake. and there’s school tomorrow! grrrrrrrrrrr.

i think i need to stop by home depot tomorrow. we gotta patch that hole up good! i can’t be spending nights trying to chase you around the house! or worse, wake up in the morning to find you dead. sorry, my girls, but the cage is where you must stay.

hope you enjoyed your last romp of freedom, for you will not be having any more, as long as i can help it!

you feel so good. so nice and soft and tempting. i don’t think i can resist your calls much longer!

what is up?!?! sometimes you work and sometimes you don’t? you’re making me so frustrated!

i’ve grown weary of you. i at times want nothing to do with you; at times i realize i do. but i’ve just been so hurt lately. so very hurt. and you don’t even care.

i’ve been feeling sorry for myself lately, and i know that’s not good. but since i rarely ask for it, the times that i do put myself out there, i guess sometimes i just want to be acknowledged. that’s all.

gosh it’s been a while! but someone said it was just a year, but it felt like forever. but i guess you’re enjoying it up on the mainland and will stay there forever, no matter how much you say you want to come home. i wonder if it’s because of your lifestyle? are you afraid? i really don’t think you should be. i’m pretty sure most of us know. and it’s okay with us, really. yes, my cousins rib you good…but for the most part, they’re understanding. for the *most* part.

i’m just saying this because i can see how much you miss here every time you visit. i’m sure there’s all sorts of good things on the mainland but i know that here is where your heart is. i know you accepted that position and you will be gone for another year but i hope that you’ll be back soon. i don’t think you know how much grandma misses you and worries about you. i don’t know if you know how much it breaks her heart to have you so far away. but i do hope you come back soon to the place you enjoy and the people who love you.

hope it won’t be another year until we see you!

my gosh you gave us a scare tonight. we came home and found the door halfway open and knew you had escaped. we looked all over for you. we searched everywhere for clues where you had been, but only found a few near the cage. we knew you were not in that area already. frustrated, i ended up yelling at the boy, and he went to sleep upset. i went to bed, resigned. i figured you were long gone, if not in distance, then in life.

i turned on the computer to drown out my sadness. after catching up on all the email and getting ready to write a letter, what do i hear, coming from underneath my own bed? your cry! your cry that you sometimes emit in a dream echoed through the quiet room. i peered over the bed and poked a backscratcher underneath, when i heard scrambling on the other side. i went to the other side, but apparently you had scrambled back. you were playing games with me, huh? naughty girl.

i went and got all your favorites–your bath tub, your favorite treats, the water bottle (i knew you must’ve been thirsty). i made as much noise to try and entice you out. however, you are not like my beloved boy i had years ago–you refused to come out. i shook your treat box; nothing. i thumped your bath tub; nothing. i tapped the water bottle; still nothing. what was it going to take to get you out? i was losing my patience.

i almost woke the boy to tell him to make noise at one end of the bed so i could grab you once you came out the other side. i would’ve, if it went 30 minutes more! but here it was, nearly 1 1/2 hours since i started to find you. i was getting frustrated. what was it going to take?

i finally set up your bath tub on one end of the bed, and then flopped on the bed, grabbed a old game box, and started making noise at the other end of the bed, hoping you’d go to the other side, find the bath tub, and jump in. but nothing happened. i went all up alongside the bed and nothing. i was getting verrrry angry.

then i spied the computer desk. there was a smaller table under it with the printer on it–i noticed the printer paper part was down. a few pieces of paper were on the floor, chewed up! aha! clues! i shook the box under the tables, and whoosh! you came flying out, jumping onto the bed, and landed right in my lap! i grabbed you quickly, as you were certainly surprised that i was on the bed, and that of all places to land, you landed right where you did! you looked at me terrified as i scolded you. “naughty girl! naughty, naughty girl!”

i gave you your water bottle but you refused. you’re so stubborn!

i finally got you back in the cage with your cagemate, even though you pushed away, trying to get out of my grasp. i had to shove you in. no treat for you! i instead gave your treat to baby girl, since she didn’t escape like you did. you went and sulked in the corner. at least you’re safe.

or so i hope. i know i’ve read forums where other people’s pets have escaped and even though they were found later, and seemed alright, they ended up dying a few days later because on their little escapade of “freedom” they ended up chewing something they weren’t supposed to. so i won’t know for a while if you truly are okay or if you got into some mischief on your run. but i do hope you’re okay. you scared me and my son. we were both convinced that when we finally found you, you’d be dead.

well, the hole is now patched up even as you eye me angrily. no, you may not have free run of this house specifically because it’s not safe for you. it’s for your own safety, girl. you have a huge play area to play in, yet you want to come out and explore? i know you’re naturally curious, as all of your species are, but still! for your own good, you need to stay in your cage! i’m sorry, but that’s what it’s gotta be!

well, i’ll check up on you tomorrow morning. i hope you’re okay, and it’s just because you’re mad at me and not because you’re hurt that you’re just staying in the corner. be like your cagemate and behave!

thank you.

you need to get over yourself. you for once think that maybe, just maybe, you’re doing somewhat good and perhaps are making a difference in the children … and boom. you get hit with another letter, criticizing you for giving something to the kids that is not “grade-level appropriate.” *sigh*

i was so inspired and eager to work with the kids and now it’s all dashed again and out the window.

why do you keep this up? what is holding you back?

fear, i guess. but is the stress worth it? is this constant feeling that you are not doing good no matter how hard you work worth it? maybe i should leave it to the people who really do enjoy it. just the other day the principal was saying that there are many people out there (on the mainland) that are just *dying* to come teach here. well, they should. i should give up my spot and let someone take it. why stay in this job when it’s all heartache and disappointment?

because you like to punish yourself, i guess. WELL QUIT IT!!!