Lika’s Log

A friend sent me a story about a person who wrote about their experience with waxing. That reminded me of my own experience. For the record: NO I have never had a Brazilian done.

After reading all the good things about waxing, I thought I’d wax my legs. How hard could it be. Wax on wax off. Not. All the things I read about waxing never mentioned anything about pain or torture. It all said its better then shaving. Little did I know that was just a matter of opinion. And like the masses I went to WalMart to buy a waxing product.

Who knew there was more then one type? Heat or no heat? Being the wax virgin that I was; I decided on getting the one that you didn’t heat up. I figure one less step and I would avoid burning or hurting myself. Half wrong.

So I go home read the instructions. Ok, I can do this. I glop dat yucky sticky honey consistancy matter on a patch of my leg about 2 inches by 5 inches. Then I cover it with the special piece of cloth given in the kit. I rub it down good as many minutes as the instructions told me. Then I ripped the cloth off. AND WENT OFF ~ FK dat was frkng painful. Owww-weeee!

I didn’t go into shock but I was in shock. For some reason I was not expecting pain. Ouch! I need to do this again and again. Crap! Ok I said shit! I looked at my leg and the amount of hair removed. I’m like you gotta be kidding me. Repeat until all hair is removed. That would mean doing this ‘crap’ another 50 times maybe and thats just one leg. I was busy rubbing my ooowww-wwweeeee. Dang live and learn.

Imagine waxing your own crotch? How comical can that get? The vaginal area is a very sensetive area so why would I even want to entertain myself with that thought? I suppose I shouldn’t knock it until I’ve tried it. How much does it cost, I have to pay for one? *L* In an article I read some women said it made them feel sexy. I believe MEN think a puberty-ish looking belot is sexy and could careless about the mind. I believe sexy starts in the mind not in a bolohead belot.

I’m not into pain. Who ever invented this crap was a masochist. I can see where you would pay somebody to do this. I would pay someone to do this crap because I would want to be focus on my Lamaze breathing and controlled cussing. Wouldn’t that make me part S&M-ish also, paying someone to inflict pain on me like that. Its probably a conspiracy to recruit S&M followers. Who knows?

All this self inflicted pain made me think of people who have a Brazilian done and da person who does a Brazilian all day long. In Pidgin, Brazilian translates into BOLOHEAD BELOT. Can’t get anymore graphic den dat.

I read an article where the first Brazilian Salon was started in 1987 by 7 sisters from Brazil, the first salon was in Manhattan, NY. My question is who was the first person to come up with this bright idea? Like who was the first person EVER to get one bolohead belot or it coulda been a boto, I don’t know.

I came up with my own idea on how this could have started. Because you know my imagination preceeds me. *L* I’m sure one of my knowledgeable readers will tell me the real story. For now this is my thinking…….

Once upon one time, there were these nudist candle makers. (shuddup you guyz are laughing awreddy) So this nudist couple are making candles. Think 3rd world country Brazil, no electricity so they gotta make candles, right. Mrs. is pouring wax into candle molds and OOPS, spills some on her crotch area. She is screaming bloody murder, hot wax stay synging her belot. Ow-wweee, ow-wee, ow-wee. To the rescue; Mr. grabs a towel or rag (papertowels weren’t invented yet) and rubs her hot waxed belot hud. Then he pulls it off fast! Lo and behold ~ a bolobhead belot. Wha-lah da first Brazilian!

He looks at her hairless, pubesant looking belot. All excited, “aye zahzoosh mommylinda que guapa?” (He’s Portagee/Spanish) She’s like “what? what?” With each “what” his boto grows and she’s turned on and as they say…..the rest is history. Literally HIS-story.

I mean who would intentionally pour hot wax on their crotch. Do guys have Brazillians done? I know body builders and swimmers wax or shave certain areas of their body. Its part of the sport. I’ve never inquired about da boto section doe. I mean what do I care if a guy has a bolohead boto, is he from San Francisco? nahnahnah I don’t mean to pick on da guyzzzzzz……….

I read this article in Cosmo magazine once, it was written by a person who does nothing but Brazilians all day. What are these people called……um? Hair Removal Technicians. Something like that. HRT? I always thought HRT was Hostage Rescue Team. Well woteva? So anyway this lady wrote about removing hair from belots all day. She wrote alot about the skanky things that happened to her; like wahines on their rags, and pilau graphic stuff. A total turn off. I think her goal in writing that story was to not make people come visit her. I know I wouldn’t. Eeewwwll wot if her write about my belot? How rude!

I’m thinking if a Mr. wants to remove the hair from his Mrs. then HE should do it. He’s da one complaining about the hair tickling his nose. LOL

This entry was posted on Thursday, September 22nd, 2005 at 7:28 am and is filed under Belot Soap Operas. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.