Even before my kids understood the implications, I’ve always told them; if/when you think you like somebody as in a boyfriend/girlfriend you need to know who their parents are. If that person doesn’t not know who their Dad is then they need to find out. My kids just think I’m niele like that with their friends cause I always asking questions, giving’um the 3rd degree etc. I use to tell’um if da person real Asian kine but get big straight nose, you betta find out. Dey tawt I was nuts. Eh, DH was stationed in West Pac for how long? *L* (No laff HJB, you too!LOL)
Fast forward to now….I’m reading MOLOKAI NUI AHINA. (Mahalo Kirby) Its a good book, I’ll write about it when I pau. Anyway I came to da part where Gramma tells da boys to stay away from “dat girl.” Da light bulb went off in my head ~ OMG ~ dey related? How many books have I read where Gramma or NT tells da kids stay away from a particular kid and auwe fo’real dey related some how. I was kinda slow wit dis one, I was like HUH? I had to draw myself da pic-cha. LOL
Reading it reminded me how in this day and age, you never know sometimes if you are related to someone, somehow. In this day and age it even gets more complicated with sperm or egg donors etc. Like the story about this doctor who was the MAIN sperm donor, and now there are so far 7 or 8 siblings who found one another, all different Momma & dat Docta da fahdah. I think thats kinda creepy myself but dats anada entry.
When my daughta was 1st grade she came home one day and asked me “Mom was you pregnant to me?” I didn’t think anything about it and I told her “yes, I remember being hapai, going into labor and shitting her out.” Her response was, “I came out of your tummy you was pregnant with me?” No you came out of my belot…no I neva say dat….I was just thinking it. “Yes you were in my tummy and you came out.” She was satisfied with that answer and went back out to play. Later I found out one of her friends had explained to her that they were adopted and that meant her mom was not pregnant to her. My daughta was trying to find out if she had been adopted. Smart yeah, see me I would not have thought to ask that. Duh no wonder that one grew to be one PhD.
For whatever reasons, I use to think I was adopted. As a kid I always felt different. I don’t think I look different. It was just a feeling or maybe a phase, a rebellion thing. I felt different or odd. Maybe it was da pakalolo…nah nah nah, was way befoe dat time. I think I’m past dat now. (Both da pakalolo & feelings) But IF I learned otherwise, I would be the first to say see I told you so, nothing changes I’m still me.
I think every ohana has a jump da fence story or hanai or out of wedlock or Mom is really Grandma or circumstance to that effect kine of story. Back in da day, I know my Mom’s generation, they will literally take secrets like that to their grave. I think nowadays people and circumstances are more open and forgiving. Or I hope so.
In Oklahoma long time ago da family discussion at Granny’s house was about kinfolks marrying one another. You know 1st cousins, 2nd cousins what have you. To me cousins is cousins, blood relatives yeah; regardless if its 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th. So everyones talking aout the family there and DH says “well at least I know I ain’t related to my wife.” So den his oldest Unco comes over to me and he starts to tell me a story about when he was stationed at Big Island during the 1940’s.
OMG ~ who knew? He gave me a name of the mom and the town and he knows it was a boy. He has never ever had contact. Unco makidiedead a few years ago. This “son” would be in his early 60’s now I think. I’ve thought about searching for him but nah, wot I going say; you my husband’s cousin and your Dad was so and so, and so wot? You know what I mean. Anyway I’m thinking get one Filipino wit one big straight nose Hilo side, thats assuming da Native blood moe estrong den da Filipino blood. Bagaong powah yeah.
Its unreal that in this day and age there are so many kids in foster care and waiting to be adopted. There are babies making babies, there are drug babies, there are irresponsible parents on drugs & what have you. Even more sad babies being born addicts or being abused becasue of parents who got no business making babies. There are even parents who think once they no can handle their kid, they can just leavem’ with somebody; they give up on their own kids. KIDS ARE NOT DISPOSABLE. You bring’um in this world, YOU are responsible for the rest of your life. Some people making babies don’t get that…….
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August 26th, 2007 at 6:37 pm
LMAO… so TRUE!!! my niece is one baby wid her BF who she goin marry but now we find out dat he stay her 2nd cousin on her fadahs side LOL… ohhh wellll too late now yea?
September 1st, 2007 at 7:37 pm
I love how Judge Judy handles stuff. She glares at da stupidhead/neglectful parent oa parents and says, “Eh, u old enuf foa make baby u old enuf foa support um!” Oh yeah, Judge Judy neva talks in pidgin doe. Or, “You should’ve thought of that before you made a baby!” Yelling at da parents. I say, good foa her. Lettum have it.
Dis one wahine had sometin like 5 keeds and 5 different faddahs foa dem. Plus she stay on welfare. And Judge Judy wen tellum both, “Eh, guess who stay supporting u! ME!! Go out and get one job!”
Go, girl, go!! U my hero!